Alternate Discordian Beliefs

A Discordian must believe that Eris Discordia rules the Material Universe -- and that She won it from God in a divorce suit during the Beforelife, and that the French anarchist Pierre Joseph Proudhon was Her attorney at the trial, and that nobody is Her Prophet, and that eating hotdog buns is a sin. All else is a matter of individual conscience.
      Graven images and icons and pictures of Eris are all right as long as they are flattering.
      Safe sex -- with a condom, rubber gloves and a wet suit -- is fine as long as you don't fall in love.
      You may covet your neighbor's ass -- providing your neighbor is into it.
      You may drink, but not to escape problems. (Like the Maltafarians of the SubGenius Church, you may only drink to create problems.)
      There is no prohibition against prayer -- which is not to say we think it is a wise activity.